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The Crush Club


This is about finding connection ๐ŸŒŸ, not matches.

This is an online dating experiment where we do the swiping for you. The catch? Sign-up, fill out our survey, and answer honestly. From there, weโ€™ll help you find people around the city that youโ€™d vibe with.

In fact, you will be invited to parties to meet these folks. All you have to do is show up, be yourself, and make new connections. ๐Ÿšซ No profiles, no swiping, and no more cheesy pick-up lines. All that stuff is just a game.

When you get an invite, weโ€™ll let you take a peek at the guest list. If you RSVP, youโ€™ll be added to a group chat to get know a bit about each other 24 hours before the event. This is the only moment youโ€™ll spend talking to people online, the rest will unfold at the event.

Crush Club events will take place in secret locations across Manhattan. This is not a speed dating event. This is a party โ€” full of interesting and like-minded folks, carefully curated based on interests, values, and community groups. Itโ€™s like meeting the tribe you didnโ€™t know you were a part of.

We believe in the law of attraction. If you focus on being your authentic self, then you will naturally attract the right kind of people around you. Donโ€™t they say it just happens when you arenโ€™t trying too hard? Just keep it ๐Ÿ’ฏ.

Online dating is more complicated than it needs to be. It has given us unrealistic expectations and more anxiety about finding โ€œthe oneโ€. Well, the Ancient Greeks had a more holistic definition of love, they identify 6 types:

  • ๐Ÿ’‹ ๐Ÿ‘… ๐Ÿ”ฅ Sexual passion (Eros)
  • ๐Ÿค— ๐Ÿค ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€โค๏ธโ€๐Ÿ‘ฉ Deep friendship (Philia)
  • ๐Ÿ™ˆ ๐Ÿ‘ฏ โšฝ๏ธ Playful love (Ludus)
  • ๐ŸŒ ๐Ÿ˜‡ ๐ŸŒˆ Selfless love (Agape)
  • ๐Ÿ’— ๐Ÿ’ซ ๐Ÿ’ Longstanding love (Pragma)
  • ๐Ÿ’– ๐Ÿ’† ๐Ÿ‘‘ Self-Love (Philautia)

The more you enrich your life with these types of relationships, the more you will thrive. Crush Club is meant for you to find all 6 forms, but it begins with a crush โ€” that initial moment where you meet and feel a connection with someone. So you might make a new friend, find your business partner, or even your next date.

Itโ€™s time to approach online dating differently, are you up for it?

๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’˜ Click here to get started ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜

FAQs ๐Ÿค”

๐ŸŽ‰ When are these events happening?

ASAP! The more people sign up the better. Tell all your friends! Iโ€™m hoping to throw the first Crush Club event as early as next week April 14th. Please note that you might not be invited to the first event. It depends if we have enough for certain pools of people. So please, tell all your friends!

๐Ÿคทโ€ Who are you inviting to these parties?

Based on your survey results, I will try to curate guests lists based on shared values, interests, and communities. However, I will also make sure the guest list is diverse and inclusive!

๐Ÿ˜ณ Why are you asking so many questions?

We want to make sure we connect you people you get along with. Youโ€™re only going to do this once. No need to download an app. All you get are invites. It seems a lot but itโ€™s really minimal effort down the road. Pro-tip: Answer the survey honestly, that will improve your results!

๐Ÿ”ฎ How do you decide who is invited?

We match people based on shared values and passions. I also compare big 5 personality traits (the 20 questions). I am referencing psychology theory from Dr. Michal Kosinksiโ€™s research. His work indicates that humans prefer to bond with people who have similarities in these areas. I wonโ€™t bore you with the science but if you are curious, let me know so we can nerd out.

๐Ÿ™„ I donโ€™t do well in social gatherings

Every Crush Club event will have a host to help facilitate things. When you arrive at the event, there will be some icebreakers to make it easier for you to chat with folks. Donโ€™t worry, weโ€™ll be there to support you!

๐Ÿ™† Why are you doing this?

My name is Ruth, Iโ€™m doing my Masters in Interaction Design at SVA. For the past 7 months, Iโ€™ve been studying Online Dating for my thesis. Iโ€™ve analyzed this topic through the lens of design, psychology, neuroscience, economics, and behavioural science. After hearing my friends and everyone around complain about online dating, I thought Iโ€™d look for opportunities to improve human interaction and connection.

๐Ÿค“ I want to learn more about your work

I have documented some of my major lessons, insights, and other dating experiments on my blog: Tinder Lovinโ€™.

๐Ÿ™‹ Have more questions?

Feel free to reach out on Twitter: @ruthtupe

๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’˜ Click here to get started ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ’˜

Earlier Event: October 21
Curated Table @ The Orphaned Starfish Gala
Later Event: April 30
The LOVE Parade NYC